Monday, July 28, 2008
Earlier this evening as I set holding a bottle of pills in my hand and my phone range. I didn't pick it up then my cell rang which interrupted what I was thinking of doing. It was a friend, she knew I was depressed, but I don't think she knew how depressed I was. I had been crying and thinking I just could not take it any longer. After talking to her I realized that I could not let him win. I am just so tired of feeling so sad. I'm tired of the flashbacks and the body memories. I'm hoping the therapist I see on August 7,2008 will help. I feel if I can not get some of this out I'm going to die. I am trying some of the tips from Dr Deb post on flashbacks. Trying to keep grounded is the hardest. My son doesn't understand this at all, which makes me feel bad. I'm so depressed I don't feel like doing anything.