Extra Help For The Holidays

My therapist has increased how frequently she is seeing me right now due to the holidays. I will be seeing her weekly right now. She has been so good at helping me through some really rough spots. My psychiatrist had me see my PCP because of my purging. She had lab and ECG done. My ECG was abnormal so they have me set up for cardiology testing, My tremors have not improved, so they are going to send me to a neurologist. I am suppose to be keeping a food journal and be eating 6 small meals a day. That just seems so wrong to me. I almost never eat breakfast and some times no lunch. I am afraid of what is going to happen to my weight. I'm not a small person, so I think this is the wrong thing to do. It looks like I will be spending all my time and money on doctors. Wish me luck over the next couple of months. This is really a hard time for me. It will also be the first year that I will not be able to see my oldest child for the holidays.

Thank You

For all our Veterans Thank You !

Hope In Darkness

Hope can be what saves each one of us. We may find it it in a song. A kind word. The eyes of a child. It might come when we think we can no longer make it. It comes to each of us differently. Today I take hope instead of hopelessness.

I Can Not Control Everything

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Today this is what I need to remember. I can not control every thing. There are things that are out of my control. I need to place those in God's hand. Change what I can, but know what I can not change. I try so hard to control everything. I think I'm such a control freak because my past was so out of my control.

Feeling Almost Human

I am not sure what I had, but I sure am glad to feel almost human again. I think working in a doctors office can expose you to just about anything. I am still weak but so much better. I try to get around to some of your blogs, but it is going to be slow. I feel there is so much to catch up on.

Not Feeling Well

I have been under the weather. Hopefully I will soon feel better.

Stop Messing With Me

• I feel things are out of control and I can't manage them. God says I will supply all your needs.
• I am always worried and frustrated. God says cast your cares on Me.
• I can't figure things out right now. God says I will direct your path

I have to have something to stand on now. I am told if you speak the word then God can make things happen. A lot of bad stuff is going on right now, so it was important I write this post. If you pray please do so for me right now. I am at my wits end.