Friday, March 26, 2010

I'm Not Making It

I'm not making it. It took me three stores to pick up some cat liter and cat food. I now have two cats that I did not want. One is my daughter's who moved out of state 6 months before my son died and the other cat was his. Anyway I pasted by the men department store and had to leave crying. I next tried Chris' favorite store (it was never busy) and I couldn't even make it through the door. Finally I was able at some dollar store to get the supplies. May be it's because I ate too much. I am so sick at my stomach and discussed with myself.


Anonymous said...

I'm sorry I wish i could help . huggggggggggggs

Andrea said...

OOOH...sweetie! I am soo sorry! Praying for you and sending great big hugs!

Wonderingsoul said...

Dear Wanda,

Hearing the strength of your grief and the tiredness that comes from the feeling it will never go away.

The overwhelming sense I had when I read your post is that you just need to rest.
Rest, rest and rest some more.

It won't take the pain away. I'm not saying it will. I don't even know why I go that sense, and it may be way off - and if so, please just ignore it... But it strikes me that while you are resting you are not fighting. You are not trying to pretend or be normal or be anything. The grief you feel whileyou are resting is grief that needs to be just sat with for a while, very gently.

I'm so sorry that you feel like you are not making it Wanda. You ARE making it. You are doing the best yu can but Wanda, you have lost your son and you tried to go to his favourite shop.
What IS making it in that situation?
I don't think such a thing exists.

All my love and a gentle hug.


Prayer Girl said...

Please give yourself a break. Please be gentle with yourself. Please don't be disgusted with yourself for eating too much. Forgive and love yourself as your heavenly Father loves you. You are searching for ways to cope. Eating was one. You are human.

You may not be making it at this moment, but each moment is different from the one before. You will feel like you are making it in some other moment.

Prayers for you,

Anonymous said...

I hope your stomach is better.