Monday, June 22, 2009

One Day at a Time

I was able to visit some blog yesterday and catch up on some of my friends. It was good. I ran out of energy,so I had to stop. I'm on all new meds. They are talking about ECT. My bi-polar is still not under control. They say I MUST start working on the PTSD stuff if I going to get any better. I exhausted. Thank everyone for being there for me!

10 comments:

Mike Golch said...

One day at a time is the right thing to do,and if need be 5 mins.at a time.I have had to do that.

Just Be Real said...

Dear one, thank you for making the effort to even post here at your blog to keep us informed. Just as you say, "take one day at a time." Blessings dear one and much

((((safe hugs))))

Dreaming again said...

259-0089 now you've got my number!

Ethereal Highway said...

I guess no one else is going to say it, so I will. ECT? Wanda, I know you are in a bad place, but you need to find a way to gather up every bit of inner strength you have and take control of your treatment before it's too late. Have you ever thought that there might be a good reason why your so-called bipolar cannot be stabilized with medication? There is no pill that can take away the trauma of sexual abuse. None. It does not exist. And how on earth would scrambling your brain with ECT help PTSD? That would only be more trauma and it would drive it deeper down where you cannot work with it. It would be similar to all the pills, only worse and providing the possibility of instant and irreparable damage to your brain and nervous system. At least the pills take time and give us an opportunity to notice that they are killing us so we can put a stop to it while we still have a little bit of health left. Sorry to have to be so blunt, but you really have to do something before the Dr. Mengeles destroy you for good. You have to find a way to educate yourself to other possibilities and somehow take control of your situation.

And are you still discounting yourself by demanding that you forgive? Is it really worth it, Wanda? Having feelings is NOT a disease and it is NOT a sin. Come on, Wanda! Rally every inner resource you have. You can do it. No one else can save you. Only you can do it. I KNOW YOU CAN. Don't let people tell you that your pain is a disease. They are lying to you, Wanda. Flat out lying. And every time you buy into it on the inside, it will cause a disturbance there as well.

Wanda's Wings said...

EH,
Thank you for your frank information about ECT & PTSD. I'm so depressed. No manic episodes in 3 weeks. It was so brief. PTSD seems to be the biggie now. The abuse was very real and very severe. I hate Fathers Day and what it stands for.

jumpinginpuddles said...

you can do it !!!!!!!!!

Ethereal Highway said...

You are allowed to hate father's day. You are allowed to hate whatever you hate and no one has to approve. Are YOU depressed, Wanda, or is it YOUR FEELINGS that are depressed (by being suppressed)? I believe you that the abuse was severe and very real. I believe you and I believe in your right to have real feelings about it, too. Don't let anyone stifle your rights.

You know what gets me about the whole BP thing? It's awful to see how people worry that they are having a 'manic episode' whenever they start to feel anything other than depressed. No wonder people stuff their feelings and can't get well! Psychiatrists have convinced people that even feeling better might be a sign of disease! You have to think for yourself about this, Wanda. It's okay to think AND to feel. You don't need a doctor's permission to have feelings or to think for yourself.

Jade said...

Its good to see you posting again Wanda. I think about you often. One day at a time will get you anywhere you want to be.

Be kind to yourself and the process you are going through.

Big safe hugs to you my friend.

Linda said...

hi..been thinking about you. hope everything works out for you. sorry that I haven't visited. alot going on and I just have not had the energy to really visit blogs like I once was. I hope things will turn around soon. Have a great day!!!

'Tart said...

Dear Wanda,
I'm thinking of you. Came back to check on you - sorry I haven't been around. I wish you well.