Thursday, October 29, 2009
I am not sure what I had, but I sure am glad to feel almost human again. I think working in a doctors office can expose you to just about anything. I am still weak but so much better. I try to get around to some of your blogs, but it is going to be slow. I feel there is so much to catch up on.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
- I feel things are out of control and I can't manage them. God says I will supply all your needs.
- I am always worried and frustrated. God says cast your cares on Me.
- I can't figure things out right now. God says I will direct your path
Saturday, October 10, 2009
It seems a lot of my blogger friends are struggling now. I have been too. I am not sure the reason, but everyone seems down. This is a weekend, so let us all try to enjoy it. Find one thing that you feel good about. Just one thing and think about that. Mine is MY SON LOVES ME UNCONDITIONAL. That is cool. If everyone thinks of one thing what a list we would have. Let's try to reflect on one good thing today.
Thursday, October 08, 2009
A brisk walk in the rain felt good. The splashing in the puddles made me feel like a child. The cool drops splashing on my face and arms gave me goose bumps. It was nice to feel nature breathing on me. It seemed to help lift the depression. I enjoyed the time alone with nature and enjoyed the little things in life.
Tuesday, October 06, 2009
If the abuse had not of happen, who would I have been. I am a very kind person who hate to see injustice to any human. I care deeply. I don't trust people easily. I don't like myself much. My faith is weaker than it should be. I have spent thousands of dollars on therapy. I am still hurting. I still have the nightmares. I am flawed. I am still alive. I have not totally given up. I still fight for the right. I HAVE ISSUES! Eating disorder,SI,plus a chemical imbalance. Will I ever know who I am? I feel so alone, but God says He will never leave or forsake me.
Saturday, October 03, 2009
I really get down on myself if I feel I can not do something perfect. I don't think I am going to be able to work at different clinics because everything is done differently at each clinic. I must feel in total control and I don't. I am trying to pick up a few hours to supplement my disability. I used to be so good at my job, now doing any type of work is a struggle. How can so much be taken and you still have any confidence. I hate the shaking part. Just venting after a frustrating day.